The Carlin Ad-Speak Calculator: How Well Does Your Copy Stack Up?

· 14 Comments


Do your ads sound like ads? Do your ads boast about your superior service, your wide selection, or name the number of years you’ve been in business?

If so, you may be guilty of Ad-Speak.

Ad-Speak is language filled with plastic-coated words and clichéd phrases that deliver irrelevant information. Ambiguous claims and chest thumping give Ad-Speak its hollow sound.

Claims such as:
“We won’t be undersold.”
“Satisfaction guaranteed.”
“The best quality at the best price.”

Your customer turns a doubtful eye towards such claims. Past instances of marketing ploys and gimmicks alert her brain. And your customer uses these memories to guide her buying decisions.

But hey, don’t take my word for it. Here’s proof: The 2010 Edelman Trust Barometer reports that only 17 percent of young Americans (ages 25 – 34) say product and corporate advertising is a credible source of information. Topping it off, product and corporate advertising ranked lowest on the credibility scale of any information source surveyed.

The bottom line: The old assumptions of marketing – that you can overpower your customer with ad-speak and hype – are dead and gone. Change course. Eliminate Ad-Speak. Whack the clichés, close all loopholes and substantiate every claim.

To help you purge Ad-Speak from your advertising copy, I’ve developed The Carlin Ad-Speak Calculator, named in honor of George Carlin’s comedy bit, “Advertising Lullaby,” which speeds through a laundry list of bland and colorless advertising terms.

Similarly, The Carlin Ad-Speak Calculator is a web-based program that measures your copy against a database of more than 1,000 keywords and phrases. The program flags any terms considered to be Ad-Speak, and scores your copy’s performance.

Want to take it for a spin? Test-drive The Carlin Ad-Speak Calculator.

Hat tip: Thank you to Emerge Inc. for all their hard work in programming The Carlin Ad-Speak Calculator.

P.S. Betcha thought you were going to hear the expletives fly when you played the video of George Carlin, right? Yep, the absence of any profanity surprised me too.

Categories: Advertising Techniques - Tags: , , ,

  • http://www.philsforum.com PhilWrzesinski

    Cool, I just used the Carlin Ad-Speak Calcualtor on my last three ads and had 0% ad-speak scores on all three! (Two of them “Look at Your Radio” and “I Served Them Ice Cream” are up on my Toy House website at http://www.toyhouseonline.com/radio.html)

    Thanks for the tool and the advice and the great posts!!

  • http://www.MarketingBeyondAdvertising.com/blog/ Tom Wanek

    Outstanding Phil! Keep up the terrific work! Loved your ads, especially the “Look at Your Radio.”

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  • Jim McAleese

    Tom:

    Interesting how you thought Carlin's bit was going to be filled with profanity. Maybe the surprise will entice you to explore more about his body of work. He was not about profanity. He was a comic with ideas – a jester, poet, philospher – and yes sometimes profanity was used to get his ideas across, but not always.

    Some people look at that bit and say “yes advertising is predictable and boring” but I'm glad you saw it as a wake up call to escape the use of dead words that we see and hear in 95% of today's advertising.

  • http://www.MarketingBeyondAdvertising.com/blog/ Tom Wanek

    Hey Jim, you're right. But it was ironic that right before AND after the bit, George was cursing like a sailor. I was just glad that George ran through the entire list without profanity so I was able share it with my audience. ;)

    P.S. I love George's material. My favorite bit is 'Guys named Todd,” since my brother is also named Todd.

    Anyway. Thank you for you comments.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Wdezs-Terry-Stevens/1017311103 Wdez's Terry Stevens

    I love this SO much and will use it on everything I write! Thanks for sharing it!

  • http://twitter.com/dandridge dandridge

    A fun and useful tool. Well done, Tom!

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  • http://www.MarketingBeyondAdvertising.com/blog/ Tom Wanek

    Thanks, Mike!

  • http://www.MarketingBeyondAdvertising.com/blog/ Tom Wanek

    Thanks, Terry! I'm glad you enjoy it.

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  • http://nine95.com Michael

    Thanks Tom for both highlighting the video and the adspeak calculator. I checked my blog title and subtitle as well as a sales squeeze page that I thought would blow the needle off the scale and was pleasantly surprised with a 0% (green) indicator on both.

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